Dear Men
I am a woman. You meet at least one of my kind every day. You will find my kind everywhere. At home, at school, in college, at your workplace, using the public transport, working out at the gym, jogging in the park, at the cafe enjoying a nice cup of coffee or having fun at a club.
So many different places, but I have the same questions for you for each of those places:
- Did you ever notice that one of your kind is staring at me ravenously?
- Did you ever ask him not to do so?
- Did you ever ponder upon what I might be going through at that very moment?
- Did you ever observe that I was both scared and disgusted at the same time?
No? I guessed so.
The only women you care about obviously include your mother, your sister, your wife or maybe your girlfriend. You make sure they’re safe and hence you have a peaceful sleep. Right? But:
- Did you ever ask them how they felt at such places?
- Did you ever check their inbox?
- Or did you have a look at those creepy facebook message requests?
Honestly, I am tired.
Grope.
Stare.
Harass.
Make lewd comments.
Unwanted touch.
Domestic Violence.
I have firmly stood against them all my life as much as I could. But now I am so exhausted that I tend to ignore them. Still, sometimes, they are overwhelming. Unable to handle the burden anymore, my soul cries for help. No longer the same, innocent and child-like.
Do you think I like your “Babe”, “Honey”, “Hot pic”, “Sexy bitch” messages? I must admit I consider these mild. I have seen worse. Let me tell you something. I don’t need your approval. I am not asking for it. Neither did I ask for it when I was raped by you. Still, I tried to stand up, yet again.
But do you know what happened later? I was declared impure. Given the title of a whore. You guessed that I would have liked it when 5-6 of your kind took turns on me. The society thought that I might have enjoyed it.
Wait, did I just say society? Allow me to improvise.
Male. Dominant. Society.
Please, don’t get me wrong here. I don’t desire a matriarchal society. I just want my rights, freedom and equality. Why is it that a working lady has to come home and still cook when food is the need of both the husband and the wife? Yes, I know it has been like that for ages when your kind was supposed to hunt and my kind had to look after our children.
Now, tell me if I am wrong but, the time has changed. Hasn’t it? Can you please start taking responsibility for household chores? Obviously, we’ll work together. You know, “equality”. (I hope I am not being a feminazi.)
Okay, I’ll tell you a secret. When I try to defy all the norms, or be myself, or try to achieve something, almost everytime I am pulled down by my very own kind. Quoting an example,
“Aurat ka dharam hota hai pati ki seva karna. Bahar jaa ke kaam karna nahi”.
I beg your pardon. I do care for my husband or boyfriend but, it is out of love and respect. It is no law. Neither does it mean that I can’t be self-sufficient.
My life is a constant battle. I have fought so much. I have fought valiantly. I have fought those ravenous eyes, boundaries and rules. Yet, I fail.
Every time I feel the world is getting better, an unborn girl child is murdered, a 6-year-old girl child is raped, a 15-year-old sexually assaulted by one of her relatives, a 23-year-old is eve teased, a 40-year-old is brutally beaten by her husband and a 51-year-old denied of the highest rank as she belongs to my kind. The list is never-ending.
Even after all this, I haven’t lost hope. I know there is still some decency left in this cruel world. I’d like to say that I just want your cooperation, support and encouragement. Most importantly, I request you stand against any wrongdoing. Remember, your silence leaves scars as well. Trust me, those scars hurt a lot more than those given by the culprit.
To all those dear men who’ll like this post or share this post or comment on this post or just give it a quick read, will you ever change?
No? I guessed so.
Yours faithfully,
The kind who brought you into this world
Aprisyta is a blogger. https://aprisyta.wordpress.com/
