I have tried to provide a warning to others about their staying away from psychopaths. Of course, it is impossible in some circumstances, such as my sister and my knowing four of them while growing up. (Imagine a brother trying to have sex with you since you were thirteen years old. Imagine him continuing this behavior when you are old,)
According to many religions, I am suppose to love and forgive everything and everyone. Well, I’m sorry. I just can’t.
Mengele? Vlad the Impaler? I just can’t accept these abominations — period. So universal love is nothing except a fiction to me.
All of my life, I have tried to be as ethical and compassionate as possible, i.e., feeding the homeless, collecting goods for families burned out of their homes by fire, sending goods of mine to a leper’s colony, sending people to MLK’s Selma march, and on and on. Yet I just can’t subsume the seeming opposite of this orientation like my brother.
Of course I could assign myself other duties than I’ve voluntarily accepted, but then I wouldn’t be me — my actual self as I am formed from early times in my life, even before school. How about helping Hiroshima Maidens when five years old?
Let’s see: A sexual predator who has had a voluminous number of partners, a charming individual who can pull the act off to get his way, an insane asylum positioned or poised on two legs and more.
You try to grow up with that. Go ahead. It’s very traumatic.
At my mother’s memorial service in 2008, I was trying to comfort a close family friend by reminding her that she gave other children and me small containers of bubble liquid and wands. I was remarking about her kindness.
Then this man who I knew as a child who was listening in said, “You were always blowing bubbles.” What an unpleasant comment to make to me when I am grieving, although it is not nice at any time.
Yeah, Bubble Brain wrote Psalms when she was seven years old after reading them in the Bible and made a symphony at age ten. Both adventures were pretty easy and fun.
Meanwhile based on my knowledge base and high IQ, I could run circles around the guy who inappropriately made that comment to me. Perhaps I should have confronted him as my sister suggested after the fact.
So on to another topic, my brother has a bogus fund set up to provide donations to take families who are poor. Right-oh. He’d take them anyway to fill cabins.
He scammed one of his workers for many, many years. He gave him around $5,000 a year as salary and said that he’d be paid back in the end since the worker was listed as making $60,000 per year, a way for my brother to conveniently launder money from European clients who got a 5% discount if they gave him cash.
Of course he first tried to launder money through my sister and her husband, as well as my ex-husband. It was a no-go and is scamming Social Security with his worker. Yet he got away with the latter action.
The list of my brother’s travesties go on and on, way beyond this short compilation. How not?
Sally Dugman is a writer from MA, USA
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